Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
