spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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