It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
