Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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