I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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