Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
