doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
