ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
