I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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