just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I have feelings that need drinking.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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