Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
