its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
