He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
