We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
