Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
This show inspires me to have sex in space
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
MIDGETS
????
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
