ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize