I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
