And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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