just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
