Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
