I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
