Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
