I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
