Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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