Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
