I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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