We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
