I just cut my nipple shaving
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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