He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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