garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
