just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm too high and old for this...
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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