Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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