i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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