yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
