I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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