Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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