i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
