Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Please, let me fuck your mom
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
