Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
