if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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