look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
