Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
