i wish peter jackson would direct porn
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
