he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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