i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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