If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
