My room smells like vodka and shame
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
