I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
MIDGETS
????
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
