wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
