Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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